Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Every Guy's (insert subjective adjective here) Dream Girl

Ha Ha ha... for the longest time I maintained to friends that I refuse to die until I could whistle Bach's Brandenburg Concerto #3, entirely, all the parts simultaneously.

I was getting close to doing just that last winter, what with all the snowfall here; snowfall, which that particular concerto reminds me. I could whistle the melody and pertinent portions of the harmony pretty nicely, at least to my own ear and my own satisfaction.

Certain events on the evening of February 5th of this current year now prevent that boastful remark and deed from ever being heard. Or ever practiced again.
One must at least feel one's lips, to shape and to fashion them, in order to whistle. the reason I can't any more.

So I changed my ultimatum to G-d, 'my conditions to precede my death' to my Creator, SIR.

No problemo really, because I made a second choice. One which I used to believe would be easier to achieve than whistling Bach' Brandenburg Concerto #3....
but who expected that crap to happen?!?

Lord, I now refuse to die until I have had the exquisite experience of dancing with my first love, just once. To dance, nay, to waltz with Cybill Shepard makes me wiggle top-2-bottom as I write this. BOOORAAHHH!! A slow waltz too! Don't cheat me on this one, OK?


Is that why I never have married? I could never have Cybill herself, or find another girl to begin to fill those shoes. (White high-heels, by the way)
Cybill Shepard is my consummate, my ULtimate fantasy; I dreamed about her only last night. Again. Damned Alarm clock, I do hate you!

This time, she was one of my floor-clerk employees at the casino, only with stadium seating, and two big rooms only; it felt like she was anxious to see me again, as well! In that dream, she helped me to escape from some gunmen who shot me in my right ankle, trying to steal the casinos' bank deposit (which I never do make myself anyway, in reallife), as I walk around my casino. She hid me there, tucked inside, and in so doing, teased me with her proximity to me, always just out of my arm's reach. Later in the same dream, Matt Dillon arrested the robbers, then Elmer Fudd accidentally shot them while wabbit hunting, but that is not relevant.

I awoke believing that I was in 'The Simpsons' Morningwood prison.

Cybill Shepard has been this former teen-aged boy's dreamboat since 'Moonlighting' in the 80s. I've rented "The Last Picture Show", and "Texasville", just to gaze. To me, Cybill is always 'Hot like Fire', and nothing compares to those episodes of Moonlighting I saw as a teen, and then went straight away to some early-to-bed-Tuesday-nights-waking-dreams.

Ever catch yourself seeing, spying a dreamboat girl who just takes your very breath away?
Now you know mine, or at least the beginnings of it; her; it; them; us; it;

1 comment:

Abouna said...

You are trying to horn in on my girlfriend. Cybill Shepard and I are supposed get married sometime, someplace, some day. I think.